Out of control

So I'm sort of in a crappy position. I probably have said it before but my family never had money. Never had it to be good or bad with...it was just all bad. So now with my father being sick, and though he may not have a salary coming in he has SS and a Vets payments. Regardless it's not alot...at all. My Mom works full time at a Drs office and she makes enough to live on...herself...not to mention  my siblings to care for and my Dad...medical bills, and all the normal household expenses. Sorry...I digress...

They are in serious need of help. I really want to just go in...collect all the bills...even the ones she doesn't admit too and help them organize them. Give them a fighting chance. But I don't want to be the bad guy. I don't want take away the money she thinks she has to go shopping which she shouldn't do anyway cause she doesn't have it to spend shopping!!!!! I know. I'm talking circles. But what do I do? I can't financially help out. But I don't want them to lose their home. I don't want them to go into bankruptcy AGAIN. Now what?? Do I just suck up the hate and help? Even if I give her the tools to do it herself I don't think she would. See her "drug" her "antidepressant" is shopping. UGH. It's just out of control.